sexual domination is different than "making decisions together" and "looking eye to eye".
i think you're confusing sexual preference with a general view on life. that is, if we are still talking about the anais nin quote and the subsequent slew of opinions.
believe me, i need a partner in life, not a dominator. well, i don't really NEED a partner, but you know what i'm saying. i do not want to be dominated as a human being. but in the bedroom? sometimes? yeah, it's great. it feeds a certain sexual impulse. but that's DIFFERENT.
unless you are talking about something else entirely?
but you know, when out with a guy or whatever --- i still expect him to pay. i'm old fashioned like that.
Well, I talked to someone else about it. A very dear friend of mine. And she is of the opinion that a relationship should have - as she put it - "A captain and a first mate". Which surprised various hells out of me, since I thought that she would agree with me.
So I'm starting to wonder how this whole equal opportunity thing is supposed to work out, because I'm sort of lost.
the cool thing, to me, in terms of sexual domination/submission, is the willingness of both partners to be in that particular "sexual space". it requires absolute acquiescence and awareness.
but that would not be cool in life. i do not subscribe to ideas that a woman should stay at home while the man works (though this is my set up...or has been...but that was due to mutual agreement, not expectation). that is antiquated thinking.
women are absolutely equal and lateral to men.
but sometimes women like to get their freak on. ;)
Oh, don't get me wrong, my friend didn't suggest a 1800s scenario. More of a "when in doubt, his call". If I got that right. Still, I'm not fully comfortable with it, I think.
Still somewhat confused about the sexual thing, too. If anything, it would seem more logical that the man does what the woman wants, because it's more difficult for a female to reach climax. A guy will be fine as long as he's generally present, more or less.
8 comments:
waiiiiiiiiit a minute.
sexual domination is different than "making decisions together" and "looking eye to eye".
i think you're confusing sexual preference with a general view on life. that is, if we are still talking about the anais nin quote and the subsequent slew of opinions.
believe me, i need a partner in life, not a dominator. well, i don't really NEED a partner, but you know what i'm saying. i do not want to be dominated as a human being. but in the bedroom? sometimes? yeah, it's great. it feeds a certain sexual impulse. but that's DIFFERENT.
unless you are talking about something else entirely?
but you know, when out with a guy or whatever --- i still expect him to pay. i'm old fashioned like that.
Well, I talked to someone else about it. A very dear friend of mine. And she is of the opinion that a relationship should have - as she put it - "A captain and a first mate". Which surprised various hells out of me, since I thought that she would agree with me.
So I'm starting to wonder how this whole equal opportunity thing is supposed to work out, because I'm sort of lost.
oh, i disagree with your friend wholeheartedly.
the cool thing, to me, in terms of sexual domination/submission, is the willingness of both partners to be in that particular "sexual space". it requires absolute acquiescence and awareness.
but that would not be cool in life. i do not subscribe to ideas that a woman should stay at home while the man works (though this is my set up...or has been...but that was due to mutual agreement, not expectation). that is antiquated thinking.
women are absolutely equal and lateral to men.
but sometimes women like to get their freak on. ;)
Oh, don't get me wrong, my friend didn't suggest a 1800s scenario. More of a "when in doubt, his call". If I got that right.
Still, I'm not fully comfortable with it, I think.
Still somewhat confused about the sexual thing, too. If anything, it would seem more logical that the man does what the woman wants, because it's more difficult for a female to reach climax. A guy will be fine as long as he's generally present, more or less.
well, if it helps the woman reach climax, then ... get it? :)
Yeaaah, but why ?!
just because!
i don't purport to understand what YOU like or why...and it's kind of hard for you to understand what *I* like, and why. it's just what i like, yanno?
(i have an alpha male fantasy, maybe it's why i write romance. hard, strong, achieving, determined. probably why i like it.)
Alpha male... biology.. Yeah, that has to suffice. Thanks for the continued answers, by the way !
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